A review of problems associated with polygamous marriage in Nigeria

Introduction

Polygamy is a hotly contested practice and open to widespread misunderstandings. This practice is defined as a relationship between either one husband and multiple wives or one wife and multiple husbands. Today, ‘polygamy’ almost exclusively takes the form of polygyny: one husband with multiple wives. Polygamy is neither exclusively Western nor non-Western: it has been practised by some Hindus, Mormons, Muslims, and other cultural and religious groups. Furthermore, the Christian Bible notes several polygamous marriages, beginning with Adam and Eve’s grandson, Lamech (who was also the father of Noah), and including several important Biblical figures, such as Abraham, David, and Solomon. Nevertheless, the number of polygamous marriages is ‘relatively minuscule’ despite the cross-cultural presence of polygamy (Gher,  2008).

The standard of debate over the permissibility of polygamy has been characteristically poor. Thus, for example, some proponents of polygamy argue that it is acceptable, in part, on the grounds that many in Western societies also cohabit with multiple partners, such as married men forming relationships with mistresses. Proponents argue that such persons form relationships that involve ‘emotional commitments’ that are ‘not easily terminated’, not unlike polygamy. Therefore, in essence, a married man and his mistress are engaged in a polygamous relationship and this does not appear to generate much hostility in the West (Mitsunaga, 2005).

Finally, an additional problem is that this defence of polygamy reduces marriage to only a sexual relationship. On the contrary, the institution of marriage encompasses far more than sexual relations, but extends to a host of other functions, such as property rights, family alliances, and the raising of children. Not only is it a mistake to view polygamy and extramarital affairs as the same, but it is also a mistake to view marriage in terms of sexual relations alone.

One argument against polygamy is that it is more likely to present harmful effects, especially towards women and children, then monogamy. There are several studies that appear to support this position. For example, women in polygamous marriages are at higher risk of low self-esteem, as well as depression, then women in non-polygamous relationships (Slonim-Nevo & Al-Krenawi 2006). Other studies show that these women are also enjoy less marital satisfaction and more problematic mother-child relationships. In addition, further studies demonstrate that women in polygamous marriages are especially vulnerable to depression after becoming pregnant, as their husbands become more likely to turn their attention to their other wives (Ho-Yen, 2007). Women in polygamous marriages are typically subservient to their husbands who hold their wives primarily responsible for child-bearing (Gher, 2008).

The concept of polygamy

According to Babiniotis (2012), polygamy is “state of marriage to many spouses” or “frequent marriage”. It is a marriage that includes more than two partners and falls under the broader category of consensual non-monogamy. When a man is married to more than one wife at a time, the relationship is called polygyny; and when a woman is married to more than one husband at a time, it is called polyandry.

If a marriage includes multiple husbands and wives, it can be called polyamory, group or conjoint marriage. The term is used in related ways in social anthropology, sociology, as well as in popular speech. In contrast, monogamy is a marriage consisting of only two parties. Like monogamy, the term polygamy is often used in a de facto sense, applied regardless of whether the relationship is recognized by the state. In countries that do not permit polygamy, a person who marries a second person while still being lawfully married is committing the crime of bigamy (Zeitzen, 2008).

Prevalence of polygamy

Globally, acceptance of polygamy is common. According to the Diouf (2010), out of 1,231 societies noted, 186 were monogamous; 453 had occasional polygyny; 588 had more frequent polygyny; and 4 had polyandry. At the same time, even within societies that allow polygyny, the actual practice of polygyny occurs unevenly. There are exceptions: in Nigeria, for example, nearly 47 percent of marriages are multiple.

Within polygynous societies, multiple wives often become a status symbol denoting wealth, power, and fame. Polyandry is less rare than the figure commonly cited in the Diouf (2010). More recent studies have found more than 50 more societies that practice polyandry. Polygamy remains common in most African communities. In several sub-Saharan African countries, more than 10% of married women are in a polygamous union. Between Senegal and Tanzania stretches a “polygamy belt” in which it is common to find that more than one third of married women are polygamous. Of the nearly half a million women studied, roughly 40% who were married in the 1990s shared their husbands today. In Benin, more than 60% of women in the sample who were married in 1990 were polygamists. This is also similar for Burkina Faso, Guinea, Senegal, Cameroon and the Ivory Coast. Several other countries in the data have similar experiences in their marriage institutions. Diouf (2010) linked the demand for wives in Africa to the productivity of women in agriculture stating that polygamy is common in those parts of Africa where women have historically been most important in agriculture.

Forms of polygamy

According to Zeitzen (2008) polygamy exists in three specific forms which are:

• Polygyny;
• Polyandry; and
• Group Marriage.

1. Polygyny

Polygyny is a form of plural marriage, in which a man is allowed more than one wife. In countries where polygamy is illegal such as in the United Kingdom, United Arab Emirates, United States and Canada, someone who marries a person while still lawfully married to another commits the crime of bigamy.  Even where legal, at times it is common for men to have one or more mistresses, whom they do not marry. The status of a mistress is not that of a wife, and any children born of such relationships were (and some still are) considered illegitimate and subject to legal disabilities (Embry, 2009).

2. Polyandry

Polyandry is a form of polygamy whereby a woman takes two or more husbands at the same time. In its broadest use, polyandry refers to sexual relations with multiple males within or without marriage. Fraternal polyandry was traditionally practiced among Tibetans in Nepal, parts of China and part of northern India, in which two or more brothers are married to the same wife, with the wife having equal “sexual access” to them. It is most common in egalitarian societies marked by high male mortality or male absenteeism. It is associated with partible paternity, the cultural belief that a child can have more than one father (Zeitzen, 2008).

Polyandry is believed to be more likely in societies with scarce environmental resources, as it is believed to limit human population growth and enhance child survival. It is a rare form of marriage that exists not only among poor families, but also the elite. For example, polyandry in the Himalayan Mountains is related to the scarcity of land; the marriage of all brothers in a family to the same wife allows family land to remain intact and undivided. If every brother married separately and had children, family land would be split into unsustainable small plots (Embry, 2009).

3. Group marriage

Group marriage is a marriage-like arrangement between more than two people. Usually consisting of three to six adults, all partners live together, share finances, children, and household responsibilities. Depending on the sexual orientation and activity of the members, all adults in the family may be sexual partners. For instance, if all members are heterosexual, all the women may have sexual relationships with all the men. If the members are bisexual, they may have sexual relationships with the women as well as the men.

Group marriage implies a strong commitment to be faithful – by only having sex within the group and staying together long term. Family members may be open to taking on new partners, but only if all members of the family agree to accept the new person as a partner. The new person then moves into the household and becomes an equal member of the family.

Currently, the most common form of group marriage is a triad of two women and one man, or two men and one woman. However, there have recently been a number of polyfidelitous families formed by two heterosexual couples who become a four-some and live together as a family (Embry, 2009).

Reason for the practices of polygamy

Bailey (2006) suggests that the reasons for, or functions of, polygamy include the following:

Polygamy is also commonly found in closed cultures where open displays of courtship and affection are shunned. As well, polygamy has historically been used in place of divorce in countries with limited grounds for divorce and high thresholds for proving those grounds.

Social scientists have given various theoretical explanations for the practice of polygamy. Gough (2009) offered variants of a “male compromise” theory, which explains polygamy as resulting from socio-economic stratifications among men. They argued that monogamy is the result of a compromise among men usually following democratic development, whereby the wealthy, powerful men surrender polygamous practices and multiple wives in exchange for political support from poor men. The male compromise theory is based on Richard Alexander’s theory that nation-states impose monogamy on their male citizens to equalize their reproductive opportunities.

Diouf (2010) argued for a “female choice” theory of marriage practices, which propose that women are in the position of demanding a particular marriage form based on the availability and status of men. Where resource inequalities are great among men, women will choose to marry polygamously. Where inequalities are comparatively low, women will chose to marry monogamously. This theory is female-empowering and functional. It recognizes polygamy or monogamy as rational choices to be made in accordance with social determinants, such as resource inequality. However, it has been criticized for failing to account for the political reality that undermines this choice. In addition, the politics of inequity underlying the practice of polygamy (where there are child brides, for example) are often misattributed to the institution of polygamy.

Bailey (2006) argued that polygamy is really about male choice and preference for sexual variety to ensure male reproductive success. The extent of the opportunity to seek sexual variety may vary, however, with social circumstances, such as the degree to which women are available and how costly they are as wives (their economic value). Sanderson observed that “poorly educated women from rural areas and with low socio-economic status are much more likely to be in a polygamous marriage, and well-educated women from higher socioeconomic backgrounds, who have many more marital options, shun polygamy”.

The author rejected the female choice theory and noted that is is mostly high-status men in polygamous societies who have multiple wives as they “the means to acquire them and the personality trait (e.g. competitiveness, aggressiveness) that incline them toward the pursuit of several females. High status males mate more often and leave more offspring, a pattern that is found widely throughout mammalian species.”

Polygamy is a multi-dimensional phenomenon. It is not possible to isolate socio-cultural, economic, demographic or environmental conditions as singular causes. Rather, access and control over resources, as well as the mobility of women across borders, are significant influences.

Advantages of polygamy

Constantine (2009) claimed that the following are some of the advantages of polygamy:

• Polygamy offers people the freedom of choice to love and marry more than one individual.
• Polygamy increases the demand for woman as spouses and polyandry increases the demand for men as spouses.
• Polygamy also offers the husband more prestige, economic stability, and sexual companionship.
• It offers wives a shared labour burden (cooking, cleaning, caring for children) and an institutionalized role where an abundance of unmarried women may otherwise exist.
• Wives who wish to work outside the home are also offered the advantage of their children being cared for by family members instead of placed in day cares with strangers.
• Polygamous relationships also offer the possibility of additional income and enhancement of the family budget by reducing dependency.
• Because there are so many spouses and avenues for sexual exploration, the desire to commit adultery is decreased. This can lead to reduced stress on family-life and minimize the occurrence of divorce.
• Supporters of polygamy believe that the notion that an individual can only love one person is false.

Disadvantages of polygamy

Constantine (2009) stated that non supporters of polygamy argue:

• Polygamy exposes spouses to sexually transmitted diseases.
• A disadvantage of polygamy occurs when one person thinks they have control or own another. When this occurs, the spouse may feel powerless.
• Women in polygamous relationships sometimes worry about being replaced by a younger woman.
• Sometimes a spouse may feel neglected because the other partner has so many roles to fulfil.
• Women in western society have become more and more independent and do not need men to take care of them.
• Western society has also become more focused on the individual and less focused on family, therefore, polygamous relationships seem unappealing.
• Children growing up in these types of polygamous families are presented with confused signals about the roles of the adults and the roles of families.
• Polygamy encourages adultery because it substitutes the idea of fidelity to one person and promotes the idea of intercourse with many individuals.
• Increase in the number of marital partners increases the likelihood of incest especially in remote villages.
• Polygamy increases the practice of forced marriages. Sometimes the wives are below the legal age limit when they enter into polygamous relationships.
• To provide for more than one spouse requires greater resources.

Solution to problems associated with polygamy

In proffering solution to problems associated with polygamy, Augustine (2011) stated at:

• The practice of polygamy should be strictly discouraged as it exposes couples to severe psychological and medical problems.
• Couple should be allowed to choose their marriage mates to avoid getting married to someone who they are not compatible with, which mostly results in polygamy.
• Married couples should not if possible live too far away from their spouses.
• Strict discipline and respect for spouses should be adhered to in other to avoid the practice of polygamy.

References

Augustine, M. (2011). The good side of marriage. Luton: Apple Gate Press.

Babiniotis, G. (2012). Dictionary of Modern Greek. Athens: Greek Lexicology Centre.

Bailey, M. (2006). Expanding recognition of foreign polygamous marriages: Policies implication for Canada. Ontario: Sanderson & Nough.

Constantine, L. (2009). Group marriage: A study of contemporary multilateral marriage. New Delhi: Collier Books.

Diouf, N. (2010). “Polygamy hangs on in Africa”. The Milwaukee Journal 67(5):78-83.

Embry, J. L. (2009). Polygamy. Utah: University of Utah Press.

Gher, M. (2008). An overview of the laws and socio-cultural conditions of countries in which polygamy is legal. London: Emory University Faculty of Family Law.

Gough, E. K. (2009). “The Nayars and the definition of marriage”. Royal Institute of Great Britain and Ireland 89:23-34.

Ho-Yen, J. (2007). Marital Laws of the People’s Republic of China, 1980 as amended on 28 April, 2001. Chianti: Junaway Books

Mitsunaga, B. (2005). History of the Australian marriage practices. London: Chapman and Hall.

Slonim-Nevo, K. & Al-Krenawi, N. (2006).  Marriage and Concupiscence. Edinburgh: Ballantine Books.

Zeitzen, M.K. (2008). Polygamy: A cross cultural analysis. Oxford: Berg.